Oh, Comcast. This is getting awkward.

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Our previously-documented issues with Comcast just got stranger today. This is just getting pathetic. 

If you hadn't read my previous posts, we were going to switch our internet provider from WOW to Comcast - primarily b/c WOW charges $50/month, and Comcast had an introductory offer at about $35/month for the first 6 months. 

So we called a Comcast tech, who told us that he couldn't install internet service without laying new cable and digging a trench in our yard, and that he couldn't dig a new trench until spring... 

...so would we mind if he just dragged a few hundred feet of coax across our yard, to be buried at some indiscriminate point in the spring when they might be able to schedule it? 

Well, yes. Yes we would mind. Because that is stupid. 

So the Comcast tech and I amicably parted ways, agreeing that it's probably best if I stick with my current provider. 

And then Comcast sent us a bill for our first month of service. "It probably crossed paths in the mail with our tech's inability to install service!", I assumed. And I called Comcast, who said I was an "active customer", that the tech hadn't reported any issues with the install, BUT that I could cancel service with no issues b/c it was within 30 days of our install date. 

Great. Just cancel the account - we aren't actually your customer.  Comcast readily agreed, and said I should ignore the bill, and our account would be cancelled. 

That worked fine until 30 days later, when Comcast sent another bill, this one marked PAST DUE in red. Now I owed them for 2 months of service I'd never received. 

So I called them back. And chatted online with a service rep. And while they were completely taken by surprise "It says here you're an ACTIVE CUSTOMER!"... ultimately, they agreed that they were in the wrong, that I should have had my account canceled a month prior, and that I could ignore the bill for 2 months of service. 

They gave me a cancellation confirmation number. This thing was dead and buried. 

Until this morning, when I received a bill for our THIRD month of service, with TWO MONTHS PAST DUE and vague words about delinquent accounts collections and credit bureaus - and I also received an email (which included my cancellation confirmation number in the subject line!) explaining that while they were aware I'd asked to close my account, that the account could not be closed until I spoke with their customer retention department, and would I please call them before they're forced to take some action against me?

For service that I have literally never received. Because they could not install it. 

So this morning, I called the number they referenced. And I spoke to two reps, both of whom tried to transfer me to retention and accidentally hung up on me. (This is a common, common problem with Comcast and call centers in general lately). 

Ultimately, I got someone in customer retention, who had literally no record that I had ever spoke with Comcast. EVER. No record that a tech had ever come to my house to install internet service, let alone that they'd failed. No record of the THREE previous times Comcast had assured me that my nonexistent service was cancelled.  

They were very helpful, and promised me that my account was cancelled and closed, and that I should ignore any further bills I may receive, and that they have not (and probably would not have) contacted any credit agencies. 

So, I guess it's over. 

(Until next month, when I'm half-assuming a Comcast team will come out to my house to disconnect my WOW internet for my failure to pay Comcast for service I never actually received.) 

But until then, it's OVER. 

(And honestly, Comcast.... it's probably over for good between us. We've had some good times over the last 10 years, but this has been a new experience in pain, customer-service wise. We're done.) 
 

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